Amish

I am frustrated. I have designed a number of house's at this point. Each one less elaborate than the one before. Down to half the square footage, less corners no fancy items. All I want is good bones, windows, roof and floors. Any one of those three things I am willing to sacrifice for the money issue if I have to. I think I can work on the place for the rest o f my life. If it has good bones. Always improving it, making it into a home my great grand children will inherit. Or even a strangers family as long as they can love it. What does it take to make you love a home?? I don't question my design, its good, that's not the problem. The problem is somewhere else.
I won't get the house I have designed. I can't. The money issue won't let me. That's sad to me, I don't need fancy, I just want good quality.That's the one thing I can't have. It costs to much. Four hundred thousand dollars wont build this house, so they say.

I have struggled to find out what we needed as a family. Every one had an opinion. Then I struggled to find out what it was that I, wanted.Then I designed it and it was to expensive. It was too large. To many corners, stones, bathrooms, hot tubs, pools, fancy kitchens, windows,too much square footage. Three stories was wrong, one level, wrong. No basement, wrong. Each time I redesigned it.

Then you begin to mistrust the builders as they bid because you soon find hugh discrepancies in the same items from the same place? Is it the difference in how one man builds as  compared to another? Who will build it right. Every man is the best, just ask him! The sad part is that there is nothing new in my story. Every one out there that is building is going through it. If only my Dad and my Uncles were alive. My Grampa. We were like an Amish family in some strange way. Hard good workers, and a family that would have pitched in and done this for me.And each and every one of them would have  built some special thing for me in to the place. But all but Dad are dead and gone. Thirteen of them. And now I have strangers who try to tell me I don't know up from down! Young men who have never even been scared, or hungry, in love or lost.Hard to have respect or ask for respect. In my Uncles and my Dad you respected them first by the way they carried themselves. In the end you respected them most, by the way you carried yourself, when you were around them.

I mentioned the Amish, I have written to two of them and Andy talked with some yesterday. Perhaps they can help us? Or the Hudderites or the Mennonites? Some how I feel it would be wonderful to have them build it. Some how that would be the right way to do this. It's funny because I knew the spot on the hill where we will build when I stood there the first time, I just knew it was where the house should go. Then I knew it should be log. I knew Andy the first time I danced with him the same way.  I knew I would be with him for a long time.I knew my children's names were the right ones.  Ya even I get the point, at this point.ha ha  It would be nice if it worked out but first I need to find a way to communicate with them?

We should have more bids coming in this week and maybe for the next couple weeks. I guess we have to do what its going to take to build this house and not spend an absolute fortune doing it. I do not want my Papa to put more money into it than we have planned. I know he will but I do not want that. For the moment I am done, talk to ya later